Welcome to assumption club I think we all know why we are here, vintage plate with stand

Welcome to Assumption Club — We Think We All Know Why We’re Here

Gather ‘round, kindred spirits of side-eye and silent judgement — this 16cm decorative vintage plate is your official membership badge to the Assumption Club. Yes, you’re already a lifetime member, so don’t even try to deny it — we assume you’re here because you enjoy collecting plates that are equal parts classy heirloom and passive-aggressive conversation starter.

This is not just a plate — oh no. This is a daily reminder to everyone passing through your kitchen that we’re all just a few unspoken thoughts away from a family meltdown. Perch it proudly on your mantel, in your hallway, or by the front door to greet your guests with the warmest possible welcome: “Come in, come in — we’ve already decided what you’re like.”

Details for those who love to read the small print (and judge accordingly):

Size: 16cm of pure vintage sass

Comes with a FREE plate stand because we assume you’d never dream of laying this masterpiece flat like some common dinnerware

Strictly decorative — this plate holds grudges, not your snacks.

Handwash only — you wouldn’t throw shade in the dishwasher, so don’t throw this plate in there either.

Please note: This is a genuine vintage item, so it may come with a few charming signs of its long life — expect some fading or marks that only add to its delightfully judgemental character. After all, perfection is overrated — but assuming you’re perfect? That’s very on-brand for us here at the Assumption Club.