- Accepts Etsy gift cards
Welcome to my loose interpretation of clean.
Finally — a decorative plate that speaks your truth so you don’t have to. Gone are the days of pretending you have your domestic life together when we all know your version of ‘clean’ is just moving the pile of stuff from one chair to another and spritzing the air with something that smells vaguely like “Fresh Linen Lies.”
This gloriously passive-aggressive 16cm vintage plate is here to remind guests, in-laws, delivery drivers, and the occasional Jehovah’s Witness that you set the bar for cleanliness exactly where you damn well please — somewhere between ‘could eat off the floor’ and ‘should probably call the health inspector, but they’re busy.’
Each plate comes with its own free stand because your masterpiece deserves to be propped up like the chaotic shrine to semi-hygiene it truly is. Pop it on your mantel, in the kitchen, or by the front door so everyone’s expectations are lowered before they step foot on your questionable carpet.
Please note, this plate is decorative only — it’s not for eating your microwave dinners off of (although, honestly, who am I to judge?). Handwashing only because it’s fancy and fragile, unlike your standards.
Oh, and because this plate has been around the block — it’s vintage, darling — it may show some signs of a well-loved past life. Expect a bit of fading, maybe a few perfectly imperfect marks. Consider them extra character to match your spotless-ish personality.
Happy displaying, you beautiful mess.