- Accepts Etsy gift cards
"If You Can't Kill Them with Kindness, Try Poison" – Vintage Plate
Decorative Only – Comes with Stand (because we’re classy like that)
16cm of pure homicidal charm
Ah, kindness. That overrated weapon of the weak. For when smiling sweetly through gritted teeth just doesn’t quite cut it, may we suggest... a vintage porcelain reminder that poison is always plan B.
This 16cm plate once held scones. Now it holds grudges. Hand-lettered with the kind of advice your therapist warned you about and trimmed with florals delicate enough to distract from your increasingly suspicious herbal tea collection.
Perfect for the kitchen, witch’s lair, or HR office. Not for food use—unless you really don’t like someone.
☠️ Decorative use only (the poison bit is metaphorical… for legal reasons)
☠️ Comes with a handy little stand so you can prop it up and threaten guests with passive-aggressive elegance
☠️ One-of-a-kind – just like your murderous inner monologue
Subtle? No. Satisfying? Deeply.